Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Hansel and Gretel (prolouge)

If you've ever been to Oregon, an under appreciated state on the west coast of the Unites States of America, you would know that the vastly overpopulated section of it is the top left corner, and the rest of the state is essentially a vast wasteland with a few small (or large) towns scattered about.
This story just happens to take place in one of those small towns. It's population is a mere eighty people. As one might suspect this is the kind of town where everyone knows everyone, and lots of love, respect and support go around so there is no reason for it not to be a big thriving city-- except, of course, that everyone liked it to be small and cozy. All of the hand-built houses to the adorable little stores and markets, plus the fact that the largest chain there was a Mexican restaurant that had such fantastic success that they saved enough money to buy an old warehouse at the edge of town and turn it into an even better version of the first one. If you wanted to, you could say the only downside of that town was the dark, ominous forest that restaurant was perched outside...
Oh, that forest.
It used to be loved and cared for and treated more as a park that a forest, until the Mayor went there on an innocent walk to relieve the stress of having such responsibility. Her walk went perfectly fine, until she never came back out...
And this is where I introduce the main characters of this story: Hansel and Gretel.
Their parents conceived them on accident and were simply too poor to raise any children (though today, they have several) and abandoned them in the woods as apposed to putting them up for adoption like any sane person would (neither of them were very sane). Unlike most children who were abandoned in the forest, a part where no one in particular went at that, they did not die. They survived. They learned to feed off the land and, after a while, even put a flimsy roof over their heads made of stick and mud. They learned English around the age of five when they found a cardboard box filled with raggedy clothes and books, mostly fairy tales-- one of the town's couples also had twins around their age who had outgrown both the clothes and the silly little stories. The husband was an English professor and had been offered a job at the local collage, so he threw out his grammar books and dictionaries.
Hansel and Gretel, if you wanted to say, were the luckiest children to ever walk the face of the earth.
Being abandoned in the woods and surviving it one thing, but teaching yourself English is another.
Not only are they the luckiest children in the world, but they are completely self-sufficient.
And, if you really wanted to say, there was only one thing wrong with them:
Living your entire life away from society and never speaking to any person other than your own sibling has it's consequences. You would have absolutely no idea what human morals are, you would have no idea that killing a woman, poking her eyes out, pounding nails into her spine, and then eating her were wrong. You would think it was perfectly fine, that you were supposed to do that because it was a game. You would be just like Hansel and Gretel.